When healing feels like going backwards

There are weeks when I feel like I'm moving backwards. Like all the work I've done — the therapy sessions, the journaling, the hard conversations — has somehow evaporated, and I'm back at square one.

I had one of those weeks recently. Something small triggered something big, and suddenly I was crying in my car in a parking lot, wondering if I'd made any progress at all.

Here's what I've learned: healing isn't linear. I know that phrase gets thrown around a lot, but I don't think we really understand what it means until we're living it. It doesn't mean you take two steps forward and one step back. It means the path itself isn't a straight line. It curves. It doubles back. It sometimes looks like you're heading in the wrong direction entirely.

But here's the thing about those parking lot moments: I got through them. And then I drove home. And then I made dinner. And then I went to sleep. And then I woke up the next morning and tried again.

That's what healing looks like. Not a dramatic transformation. Not a moment where everything clicks into place. Just the quiet, persistent act of getting up and trying again.

If you're in a backwards week, I want you to know: you haven't lost the ground you've gained. You're just on a different part of the path. Keep going.